Never
by LostinStories
Summary: Leah and Sam drabble.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. It belongs to Stephenie Meyer**

This fiction is inspired by Glennis Grace with Always: http :/ www. youtube. com /watch?v=iK-brLy6704&ob=av2e

**- Never-**

It has been exactly 5 months, 22 days and 18 hours since I've heard a word come out of Leah Clearwater. I've seen her in the car with her brother or her mother, I've seen her at pack meetings, I've seen her on patrol, but she's not talked to me. Not even when we were in the pack mind together. Somehow her mind has been blank, it's rather frightening and most of my brothers don't want to run with her anymore. But that, like everything else, doesn't seem to bother her at all.

Earlier today we were all gathered at my place going over the usual things. The patrols earlier this week, business with the pack members, patrol and work schedules. Leah had been there as well, standing in her usual spot, right beside the front door, chewing on an apple. That's all she would eat these days, and we could see her growing smaller in front of our eyes. Everybody needs nutrition, especially wolves. But Leah wasn't giving hers what it needed and we saw the hollows in her cheek grow more defined, her clothes swinging around her ever smaller waist. Seth was having an especially hard time with it, barely able to look at his sister anymore. It was sad for the kid, he's done everything he knew do try and help her. She just didn't have any fight left in her anymore and nobody really understood why.

We were discussing patrols for the upcoming week when a hard cry came from the bathroom. I jumped up, knocking back my chair rushing to the bathroom afraid that I would find my Emily in some sort of danger. But when I knocked the door down, my entire body trembling with pending rage, I found nothing but her standing in the middle of the room, looking at something in her hands. A hand clasped over her mouth and tears streaming from her eyes.

"Em?"

I walked slowly to her, wonder what could have upset her this much, when her eyes lifted to mine and I saw that she was smiling through her sobs. She ran to me and pressed her small body against my chest as I wrapped my arms around her. I tried frantically to try to talk to her, get her to talk to me, but all she did was cry and laugh and clung to my shirt. I was about to lose my temper and demand that she tell me when she hold up a small white stick, two pink x's on it. I looked bewildered at Paul behind me, who shrugged. Suddenly, Leah spoke up.

"She's pregnant."

The two words were enough to even silence Emily, while everybody stared at Leah, who turned around to dump her chewed up apple into the garbage and walked out of the front door.

...

When I got to the Clearwater's place Seth and Sue were just getting into the car, Seth's eyes narrowed at me. I held up my hand, motioning to the house. He nodded and his eyes slid up to the second story. He understood that I needed to talk to his sister right now, because of this morning. Even still, his narrowed eyes gave me a clear warning. That's why I respect Seth so much; no matter if I'm his Alpha or not, touch his sister wrong and my head would still come off of my body by the end of the day.

Sue waves from behind the wheel and they backed out of the driveway. I went into the familiar house, not to long ago this had been a second home to me. Some place I came gladly, everyday.

I quietly walked up the stairs knocking on Leah's door. I waited and knocked again, but no answer came. I pushed the door open slowly. "Leah?"

She was sitting on her bed, knees pulled up to her chest, chin resting on them as she stared out of the window. The sky was a dark grey today, we'd have a storm later, that was for sure. I pushed my hands in my pockets and walked into the room, stopping a few feet short of the bed.

"I wanted to see how you were doing."

Again I got no answer. She didn't even move or acknowledge that she heard me. "I know today must have been kinda rough on you…" I tried, but what would I be able to say to her to make her feel better about it? I had no idea how to talk to her anymore.

Breaking up with Leah was something I never wanted to do, it was the most painful moment of my life. Even worse than when I found out I was a wolf. But over the months I had slowly made peace with it. Emily and I had been happy, you couldn't help but be happy at the sight of your imprint. Seeing Leah grow bitter and angry had hurt, I never wanted for her to be that way. But I understood it, we lost each other and then to find out that she'd lost me to a legend that was true, a legend that became her life. That sucked. Especially when we had to share a pack mind. But the shell she had become the past few months had been painful beyond belief. I felt like I killed her, and was reminded of that daily.

"Leah?" I tried again, sitting down slowly on the edge of her bed. "Leah?" Raising my voice slightly but still it had no affect what so ever. She looked like one of those catatonic people I'd seen once when I was at Forks Hospital. Their bodies were really all that was left.

I put a hand on her feet, wanting to make some sort of connection, making her blink and she turned her face toward mine. As she stared into my eyes I noticed that hers weren't blank like I'd expected them to be, like I had seen them so many times, but that they were filled with tears. They swam unwilling to fall over her cheeks. She reached out slowly, patting my arm, before turning her head back to the window and staring out at the rain that was coming down heavily now. Her hand was still on my bare arm and it shocked me to feel exactly how cold she was. I took her hand in mine and held it, trying to warm it.

This had been the closest I'd been to her since the day we ended it. The closest I had ever been to her pain and it was so tangible now that it constricted my chest, forcing my mouth open to take some shallow breaths. Her fingers tightened around me, the action causing me to tear up as well, she was in so much pain and still she gave me strength. Forget the tough Alpha of La Push, she always knew how to bring me back down to earth, and right now it meant that I was just a guy, mourning a loss.

...

"What happened five months ago?"

It wasn't a question that I wanted to ask, but suddenly it simply came out. It was still so strange to me that after we broke up she could yell at me and fight me on everything, and then it suddenly stopped. Something must have triggered it, and I wanted to know what it was.

She lifted her head from her knees turning her eyes on me again, I now saw the stripes on her cheek from the dried up tears that had eventually fallen. She hadn't made a sound while she cried, she hadn't even moved. I reached out with a hand, wanting to brush my thumb over the tear streaks but I changed my mind so it hovered midair for a moment before pulling back.

"You suddenly stopped talked five months ago," I said to her. "You went from angry to silent and… why?"

She smiled sadly. It took her two tried but eventually she whispered. "You don't want the answer to that question, trust me."

I shook my head, I did want the question, it's been haunting me for all this time, I wanted to know more badly then anything. "Please, Leah."

She pulled her hand from mine and I was afraid that she'd turn back to the window and that would be it, but instead she leaned over, opened her nightstand and pulled two pictures out. The first one she handed to me as of an ultrasound. One of those weird black and white pictures with a lot of undefined lines on it, but also the very clear image of a baby in a woman's womb.

"That was taken at 7 months. The baby was almost fully developed," Leah started whispering, her eyes were glued to the picture in my hand. I looked at her, before looking back at the picture. "He was big for his age, so they told me." She smiled slightly, her eyes now on the picture in her hands, a finger moving over it. She looked miles away.

"I was at work when I suddenly got really bad cramps. I thought it was food poisoning, but to be sure a colleague drove me to the ER. It hurt so bad. When I got there…they did some tests, I was worried of course because at that time I was phasing already. When the blood work came back, they examined my stomach with the ultrasound and they told me I was pregnant. I had no idea…I'd stopped bleeding, I thought it was because of the wolf thing." Her lips twitched a little again, I couldn't help but stare at her. "I gave birth five hours later, there were complications." Her voice wavered a bit. "They took him straight into surgery after I had him but after an hour they came back, and they gave him to me, wrapped up in this baby blue blanket. They had told me it was his heart, it was underdeveloped. He never had a chance…."

Her eyes looked up and found mine now, handing me the second picture. It was the picture of a baby, he could be sleeping. He was wrapped in a baby blue blanket, he already had dark hair on his head, he looked too pale to me, but I knew why.

I looked up at Leah, my mouth opening and closing not knowing if I actually wanted to ask the question that was on my lips. But she nodded anyways.

"His name was Harry Samuel Uley."

I fell off of the side of the bed, on my knees clutching the picture in my hands, staring at it. It was my son. The son I never knew and would never know. Leah's hand softly stroked my hair.

"Ignorance is bliss, Sam." She whispered. "I'm so sorry about your son."

I took her hand, pressing it to my lips as we both cried. Not just for our son, but for the life we had always wanted together but would never have.

**++ Thank you for reading ++**


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